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My 40 Day Man Fast

Hello friends!

I know I have been slacking on writing you guys and, for that, I apologize. 2012 was a wild year, full of ups and downs and many changes. Now that we are entering into 2013 and the Aquarian Age, I feel compelled to do everything I can to cleanse myself of old habits, thought patterns and behavior that is not supporting my dreams and growth. Last night, I had a conversation with a girlfriend who directed me to a blog that one of her friends and former Amazing Racer, Rebecca Cardon, is writing about cutting sex out of her life for 60 days. As I sunk into a hot epsom salt bath, I dove into the blog. It was engaging, honest, funny and struck a chord with me. (Check out her blog at http://rebeccalynncardon.blogspot.com/)

In reading about Rebecca’s journey to find her personal power without the validation of men wanting her, I realized this is EXACTLY what I need right now. I’ve been addicted to men for as long as I can remember. From charming my way into a 4.2 GPA in high school to flirting my way through Survivor, I’ve always sought out ways to attract men and get them involved in my drama so that I can feel pretty and wanted. Thoughts about men, relationships and sex occupy about 90% of my brain 90% of the time. Even when I’m starving, I find myself distractedly walking around the supermarket scanning the aisles for hot guys instead of the hot meal my body really needs.

This year I am seeking new depths of love and life. 40 days is the magic number to instate a new habit. With kundalini yoga, we do 40 day meditations to discard unhealthy habits and set ourselves in a new mindset. In Christianity, Jesus went into the desert to do a 40 day fast to get closer to God. I’m doing this 40 days of no flirting, sexting, dating or sex to rid myself of destructive dating habits and open myself up to discover what love really means for me. I’ve endured a slew of unsuccessful relationships and am tired of choosing guys that fill some kind of emptiness I have within myself. It’s time to take responsibility for the choices I’ve made and see that there isn’t anything wrong with the men I’ve been seeing, I just don’t know enough about who I am to choose a man that fits me.

As a yoga teacher and Survivor contestant, I have had some extensive experience with cleansing and fasting from certain foods. I’ve done juice cleanses to clear my mind and set myself in a state of deeper awareness of my habits around food. These cleanses have always opened my eyes to certain behaviors and emotions I had around eating, clearing the way for me to make new, healthier choices. I found that when I eat more greens, drink less coffee and eat less refined sugars and processed foods, I feel happier and more energetic. What if it’s the same thing with men? I’m fascinated to try this new experiment. I’m also terrified about what I may learn about myself. Anytime I do a cleanse, stuff comes up and it’s not usually very pretty. Since I can’t cover my emotions with a cookie or a glass of wine, I have to sit with the experience of what’s coming up for me.. tears, hysteria, pain, frustration, guilt, etc. and just be there. I have been single many times in my life, but this time I will be making a conscious, deliberate choice to forgo a man and just be with me. In essence, I am giving myself the gift of spending time getting to know myself, silly, sexy, smelly old me.

I have a feeling this is going to get messy.

If you guys are inspired to join me on my journey, I’d love to hear your comments!

 

 

 

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Richie G. - So you’re saying there’s *not* a chance???

1HEADLYT - Wishing you all the best Parvati! You can do this.. Nothing beats love for self : )

Bogdan rizescu - Love you!

Parvati - Thank you! I appreciate the support and know you speak the truth.

Pete - I wonder if cutting out the sexualizing part of your life for 40 days is like digging a deeper basement after a flood. Sure the water will go away for a while, but you haven’t addressed the true problem.

I’m no expert, but maybe you need to look inside yourself for what you truly want and then create the environment that will attract that.

You seem like a very wonderful human and I can’t imagine you not finding a very compatible partner.

–Pete

Cooper - Parvarti, you crack me up! I wish you the best of luck on this journey and I hope that when all is said and done, you find what you are looking for. Good luck!

Parvati - Thanks Cooper! That means a lot to me.

Parvati - Thanks for your comment! That’s the whole point of the cleanse.. to force the introspection needed to carve out a deeper awareness of my actions and how I am creating my environment so that I can make the changes that will bring about the type of relationship I desire.

Gwyneth - Interesting Idea. I just came out of a really weird “relationship” where I allowed myself to be subjected to a lot of bullshit. I don’t want to be the girl that tries to make a bad thing work. I’ve also been single many times but I’ve had many boyfriend “substitutes”*men who fill the role of boyfriends but are not actually boyfriends*.

So I will most defnitly be joining you on this challenge. Its time for change and growth *Woop Woop*

Kyle - I love following your posts. From what I’ve witnessed of you on Survivor and Around the World for free, I’m pretty certain you can do anything you set your mind to. Looking forward to hearing about your journey.

Markus - No sex for 40 days? I can do that without even trying. I’m not smooth with the ladies.

Parvati - Try doing it on purpose. Ladies love a challenge 🙂

William - So…what did you learn and did it last?

Tina - Wow… Just was introduced to Survivor a few months back and finished watching Heros vs Villians tonight (yes I’m late on this huge piece of pop culture!!). I really loved watching you on the show and felt a huge affinity to you. After googling you I found your page and this post and I completely know why!! We are around the same age and I too have struggled with these kinds of sex and love addiction issues. I’ve also been involved with yoga communities for many years and had a feeling when I read your name you were too. In any case, congrats on beginning your journey last year of looking at these patterns! It’s been painful and amazing for me to look into mine. I wrote an article today about some things I’ve learned, I’m sure you can relate!!
http://wwworldwildweb.blogspot.com
Namaste!

James Nunes - Hey parvati this is really inspiring what made you want to do this and why? I am a huge fan of you on survivor but also your life is inspiring to me to I would really appreciate some encouragement in this tough time.
Of my high school years

Jason Trimble - Parvati I hope that you reply to this and I just wanted to say that you are the best survivor player of all time and you couldn’t have done a better job on this website. Good Luck (;

Parvati - Thank you, Jason! It’s great to hear your feedback.

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